I feel so stupid… Picasso, of courseI left the new job. My instincts told me it was wrong from the beginning, and I chose to ignore them. Any job that makes you cry on the 5th day is NOT a keeper. I am so embarrassed by this… TweetPinShare0 Shares
Carrie H says
oh my god, no! You don't have a single reason to be embarassed – sometimes things work out, sometimes they're an absolute nightmare – you never really know until you try. Why are there so many workplaces like this?!? But thank god you could leave and not have to submit to that kind of abuse any longer. Good luck, try to look at it like this: something better is coming! And now you'll be free to take it!!
You have absolutely no reason to be embarrassed. Whenever we feel something is a right fit, whether it be a job or a relationship, no matter how short a period we've been involved it's best to walk away rather than trudging through trying to make it fit.
Something better will come along, so you keep your head high!
Don't feel stupid, you have done what is right for you – and that is what matters.
Sending my best wishes.
PS. thank you for accepting anonymous comments – I don't fit any of the other profiles (I don't know how to)
Trish in Mountain View says
You should be so PROUD of yourself for figuring it out so soon. And for not making yourself suffer. Well Done :-)
Good for you for following your instincts. What if you'd decided to "stick it out" and wasted five weeks or five months or, worse yet, five years? Well done.
Jessica D'Amico (JeDa) says
It's good to get rid of things that weigh one down…or cause tears, as soon as possible! Something much better is right around the corner!
The last thing you should feel is embarrassed. Be proud of the fact that you knew so early in the piece that it was the wrong fit and you had the courage to leave. I've been in a similar position but I took 3 wasted months to leave. I was also advised by a PR consultant not to make reference to this position on my resume. In this instance she suggested that I had been travelling. Everything will be OK. Yes, it's true.
Please, please don't be embarrassed. Be proud of yourself for recognizing it wasn't a fit and leaving.
I was a recruiter in San Francisco for about 8 years. I am familiar with poor fits in a work environment both personally and professionally. The best thing you could have done in your situation was leave -the sooner the better. No one needs to know you worked there – don't put it on your resume, don't use them as a reference…just pretend it didn't happen. And recognize how smart you are for bailing early.
Just because you had instincts that told you it wasn't right, you still needed to find out for yourself. And you did. Chalk this experience up to just that and open yourself up to a new opportunity. The right one will come along.
You have made no mistakes and are far, far from stupid. You are most definitely the opposite. xo, A
The Next-to-Nothing House says
You are embarrassed? Why? For realizing that the job and you weren't a good fit? For leaving a situation that was bring nothing but misery? No need to feel embarrassment. I would say that you are probably one of the smartest women I know. It takes great wisdom and courage to to say Enough! I'm proud of you.
You are certainly not stupid. You were very brave to leave this job when you realised it's not for you… Many people would just plod along and make themselves miserable. I'm sure you will find a perfect job very soon. You should be proud of yourself.
Best wishes from Edinburgh
I agree with all the others, you should not feel embarrassed or stupid. You are lucky that you recognized this early and were in a position to be able to leave when you realized it was not right for you. Something else will come up.
Sorry that it didn't work out, but no doubt something much, much better will arrive. It's amazing how good intuition can be. Sometimes it takes our rational minds (which can explain any concerns away) a little while to catch up. It's lucky that yours got the message after only a few days, and you can move on.
I'm sending you a big hug: no, no, no you are NOT stupid. I am an underemployed college prof who, even in this horrible market, just turned down a job I was offered b/c it was not a good fit. I felt self-consciously horrible for a couple of weeks, then decided to own my decision, which was made in the best possible way, relying on many wise advisers to sort through. My friends all say that something right will come along, as do your readers here. So, in sisterhood waiting for the right position! Stay strong; you are a talented, intuitive, intelligent woman.
Don't feel embarrassed! How can a work place be like that? It's so counter-productive. You did well to realise so soon that it wasn't right for you and should be congratulating yourself, not feeling embarrassed. I'd stayed on thinking it was "just me" and then wouldn't have left till I was having a nervous breakdown. Well done!
You did the right thing. I worked at a job that made a lot of people cry including me and stayed there 8 1/2 years.
I'm sorry to hear the job was not a good fit for you; that must be so disappointing. But you are wise, not stupid, for getting out while the getting was good. I once left a very good internship in grad school after just 10 days. I was placed in a new internship just a week or so later, and 17 years later, I am still employed by that organization. So, one door closes and somewhere a window opens up ….
Wise, wise, WISE move. Life is too short and work is too big of a chunk of it to waste on a job that does not fulfill you in very positive ways (crying every day is not positive). The right job will come along…you will see. I really think congratulations are in order here! xxBliss
I wouldn't stay at a job like that! The right job will come along! Big hug!
C'est Moi says
Life is too short to stay in a job that makes you that unhappy. I have worked in toxic work environments in the past, and not until I worked in a "normal" environment did I know what a difference it made. Staying in a place that is not the right fit doesn't only impact your job-life, but your home-life and relationships with those you love. It's work your time and theirs to make sure you find a more fulfilling job, a better match. You made the right decision.
On another note, I have recently started reading your blog, and I enjoy it so much. I find it a regular source of inspiration, congratulations on a job well done and I wish you best wishes for the future. The right opportunity is out there!
I agree with what everyone has said and admire your courage for leaving. It takes a stronger person to leave a situation than it does to stay and endure it actually. I have stayed at a job for far too long and it's had me in tears, filled with anxiety and in general wreaks havoc on my life. Yet, I'm still there. So consider yourself lucky and I admire your greatly for leaving. I'm still trying to gain the courage to do so myself.
Good for you! The world is full of people working jobs that they hate because they feel they must stay. Granted, there are times when finances or other situations require one to endure unhappy jobs (and situations), but if that is not the case — why be miserable?
You'll find another job, and this one will have your spider sense tingling for all of the right reasons.
I'm reading your back posts. I just started reading your blog a couple of days ago. I think you are absolutely right. A job that makes you cry is not the right job. I will look forward to finding what life situation makes you happy in the end.
PS: I am 58. I just started a new job and need wardrobe. I am combing your blog for suggestions. Thank you for posting this. It has been helpful.